Wall Street: We’re totally democrats! Always have been!
First and Possibly Last Appearance of “Hedge Fund Comedy Video” Genre
Strangely, almost in spite of itself, this remix of a Kingdon Capital meeting borders on amusing.
XL Capital Partners Not Backed By God
Pastor Douglas Scott, of the River of Life Church in Colorado Springs, Colorado, was sentenced to hard labor yesterday: Well, actually, the judge told him to get a job and do 200 hours of community service, although it’s not clear whether or not the two could be satisfied by working as a pastor.
In any event, Scott’s hedge fund, The Vision Fund, managed by XL Capital Partners, lost about half of as much as $24 million under management.
The judge, proving once again that all judges think they are recurring guests on Rowan & Martin’s Laugh-In, told Scott he should be fishing for souls, not wallets.
Who is George Fox?
“George Fox” is Client No. 9, who is Eliot Spitzer, except that “George Fox” is also George Fox, alleged friend of the governor, and the President and Founder of Titan Capital Advisors, LLC, a fund of funds whose web site is currently and probably rather recently “undergoing maintenance,” although the Google cache of the site tells us:
George Fox leads Titan Advisors as its President, actively engaging in the firm’s portfolio management process as a member of the Investment Committee and leading Titan’s business development and marketing efforts. He entered the New York financial markets in 1984 as a floor trader at the Coffee, Sugar and Cocoa Exchange and the Commodity Exchange Inc., where he traded for his own account for seven years. In 1992, Mr. Fox created G. Fox & Co., a hedge fund advisory firm. He graduated with a B.A. degree from Tulane University in 1981 and earned a law degree from the University of Richmond (VA) in 1984.
If the real George Fox, who is truly the victim of this “victimless crime,” has any plans for revenge on the fake “George Fox,” we suggest doing something embarrassing under the pseudonym “Eliot Spitzer.”
Court papers here.
Update: Site “maintenance” is done, and George Fox is gone. Or is he?
Of course we have your money!
Things are fine! We’re optimistic! Yes, we have your money. It’s in this safe here. Of course you can have it, but right now the door is closed, for safety, of course. That’s why they call it a “safe.” We couldn’t just leave the door open. A key, yes, we have a key. Where is that key? It’s in our office, of course, right here, somewhere. We shouldn’t say where. Can you come back this afternoon? We should have the key then. We have to open the desk drawer first. Of course, I could open it now, but if you come back after lunch, it will be easier. It’s not a problem. Everything’s fine, it’s just a matter of timing. You can come back and get your money after lunch! It’s fine in the safe for now, though. It’s all cozy and it likes it there!
Business Week: Hedge Funds Frozen Shut
What’s the Burn Rate in Hell?
Folsom, California resident and former youth minister Stefan Andre Wilson was denied bail in the mounting and increasingly weird FBI case against him, which alleges that his “Christians in Crisis Investment Fund” provided nothing more than an avenue for him to lose more than $5 million in investor funds on an Ameritrade account, to put a down payment on a million-dollar home, and to buy his wife a Gallardo Lamborghini and then a Porsche Cayman. His wife, the former Christina Silvas, is a one-time stripper who ended her career so her daughter could continue in her Christian day school, although the school was disappointed to hear that she later posed for Playboy’s web site.
One investor told the Folsom Telegraph that Wilson’s outfit’s headquarters looked “impressive” with 34 monitors on the wall.
Apples, anyone?
Though we admit it is extreme to suggest bankers start vetting apple cart vendors, it is rather disturbing to hear that Peloton Partners, a $2 billion London-based hedge fund, shut down last week. This seems more important than the usual collapse, unless we are misreading it entirely, which is likely.
Peloton’s demise comes after posting spectacular gains–87 percent in 2007!–with prescient subprime bets, and from a fund leveraged (or “geared” as they say in London) a mere four to five times, very standard and “safe” for a hedge fund. Long Term Capital Management, which imploded in 1998, in contrast, was up 20 to 1 at the end.
The Financial Times reports here.
Talk of a resulting domino effect–with mass fund closures–gets kicked off by the Times here.
